Ask the Yangxifu: Opposite-Sex Friendships in Asia

Ask the Yangxifu: Opposite-Sex Friendships in Asia

Eleanor asks:

I’ve recently befriended a student that is chinese in the usa. We lived in Asia for just two years and talk Chinese just about fluently, but my grasp of Chinese culture that is friendship/dating still pretty basic. He and I also have actually discussed examining the risk of being a lot more than buddies, but both of us consented to just simply simply take more hours to make it to understand one another in the same way buddies for the present time and never to hurry such a thing. I think there’s an evident undercurrent of attraction if we decided we were unsuitable romantically that he would back off friendship-wise as well between us, and I’m worried that. In Asia, i did son’t see numerous opposite-sex friendships (besides with a high college aged children), and I also stress when we don’t wind up dating that I would personally lose him as a buddy too. We like and respect this person a whole lot, that our friendship can continue even if one of us finds someone else so I hope you can reassure me.

Lots of my closest buddies in China are actually men — including Peter, a man we also call my “older sibling. ” But not one of them are ex-Chinese boyfriends. And given other yangxifu Jessica‘s response in this essay about dating and marrying Chinese guys, I’m not by yourself:

It really is uncommon for ‘exes’ in China to keep buddies.

Therefore what’s up utilizing the ex-factor? Numerous Chinese have suspicious whenever their spouse or partner continues a relationship with an ex — that, ultimately, they’ll be much more than buddies. Read More